On the first day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch sent to me,

a cartridge in anUzi.

On the second day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch has to see,

Two Hillbilly Kylies….

On the third day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch has to hear,

Three wimmin gabbing….

On the fourth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch’s claim to shame,

Four no good stinking FEBs….

On the fifth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch has within it,

Five old  SMC!…..

On the sixth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch goes to a the pub for,

Six pints on a Friday….

On the seventh day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch go on holiday,

Seven pished Hotrockers...

On the eighth day of Christmas,

The Rannoch go for a curry,

 Eight chicken bhoonas…

On the ninth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch has a Dinner Meet,

Nine stomach pumps….

 On the tenth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch go hillwalking,

Ten strung out padders…

On the eleventh day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch go to a bothy,

Eleven bastards blootered

On the twelfth day of Christmas,

 The Rannoch made me drink,

Twelve cans of Stella,

Eleven bastards blootered,

Ten strung out padders,

Nine stomach pumps,

Eight chicken bhoonas,

Seven pished Hotrockers

Six pints on a Friday,

Five old  SMC!,

Four stinking FEBs,

Three wimmin gabbing,

Two Hillbilly Kylies,

and a cartridge in anUzi.