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www.climbrannoch.co.uk
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“We can rebuild him”, by Big Al, 27 Nov '04

Due to advances in medical biotechnology it is now possible to build the perfect climbing, hillwalking and drinking machine from the old, injured and defunct bits from the old, defunct and injured Rannoch members.

BODY PART

INJURY AND RANNOCH 'MEMBER' (so to speak)

  • FEET

 

 Bunions and corns from Colin

 

  • ANKLES

 from Big Al, talo-fibular damage

  • CALVES

 strained gastocnemius and pulled soleus muscles from JD

  • KNEES

 Left one from Shandboy (inflamed illiotibial band). Right one from Colin (cruciate damage).

  • GROIN

 Protruded inguinal from Roger.

  • THIGHS

 from Big Nick….nothing actually wrong with them they are just freakishly long, (could also include Bish’s nice scars).

  • HIPS

 One from each of Shandboy and Tim, damaged in falls

 

  • PELVIS

 smashed, courtesy of Bish and Roger.

  • BACK

 Lumbar region. Perm any one from Stef, Andrew and Big Al.

 

  • STOMACH

 Beer Belly from not so Wee Iain.

 

  • LIVER

 

cirrhotic cesspit from Big Al.

  • SHOULDERS

 rotator cuffs from Willie

 

  • ARMS

 ‘Ape-Index’ King Riceboy

  • ELBOWS

 – climbers elbow (tendonitis) from virtually any of the rock men, and also Rannoch elbows often found propping up bars.

  • WRIST

 broken wrist (now pinned) from Roger

 

 

  • FINGERS

 

 -  numerous pulled finger tendons (see ‘Elbows’ above)

 

 

  • NECK

 brass neck of Shaz for pretending to be a member

  • MOUTH

 

– from Rhona…never shuts it.

 

  • EYE

  Webbo

  • CHROME DOME

 Colin, Andrew
  • FACIAL HAIR

 Gavin

 
  • GOOD KICKING

 

 The day the Bastard Squad became the Battered Squad (enough said)

Big Al, Gav, Shand Boy.... and yes...

 

   Chicken-shit Nigel