Rannoch Mountaineering Club 

www.climbrannoch.co.uk

”It’s like riding a bike. You never forget how to do it!”…...I replied, when asked about how I felt about not having done a winter route for around 7 years and planning to go away with the lads for a weekend up at the Ling Hut in Torridon.

My first stage of preparation was to go up into the attic at home (this involves a difficult mantelshelf move, because I haven’t got round to buying a big enough ladder) and blowing the cobwebs off my ice-axes, crampons and double boots….then it was only the cobwebs in my arms and my head to worry about…...ach it’ll be alright man…...riding a bike and all that.

As usual, plans were constantly changing and being updated. In the light of the duff weather forecast, we decided on a criminally early start on Saturday morning and a stop-off to climb in the Northern Corries before going up to the Ling Hut.

We arrived at the Cairngorm carpark at around 8:30 am, and it was getting busy…...a myriad plankers and board-stupids were preparing to be funicularised, and there seemed to be a several myriads of ‘climbing types’ milling about. I could make out a serpentine of bodies snaking its way towards Coire an t’Sneachda in the murky distance.

After sorting out the teams, and the gear, we joined the crocodile, and slithered towards the corrie. Colin and Shandboy edged ahead, they probably had something hard in mind. I slipped behind Bish, I had something easy in mind. The crags soon came into view, and it was with a gasp of incredulity…...there were hundreds of the buggers! A swift head count revealed it was closer to 150…...and a mental-census confirmed there were 68 Nigels, 46 Rogers, 26 Simons, one each of Geoffrey, Bertram, Jeremy, Lionel, Rupert and Charles. And of course 2 Als (1 big, 1 wee), a Colin and a Bish.

It was like looking at a termite mound, there were little black dots all over the place…...but there was one route with only one party on it…...a quick look at the guide showed it to be ‘Doctor’s Choice** (IV,4)…...hmmm a bit harder than I wanted but it was ALL THERE WAS TO DO. Bish and I geared up and made a bee-line for the belay at the bottom, slipstreaming each other all the way…...just like riding a bike…... The other party were a pitch and a half up so no problem there…...but wait…... a couple of bandits at four o’clock going for the same route…...get a spurt on man…...YES!…...beat the scumbags…...ARF ARF…..it was wee Al and Colin…..in the queue lads, in the queue.

After a toss-up (fixed), I let Bish set off up the first pitch, he made it look straighforward enough, and he shouted down he had a bombproof belay. So up I went, full of trepidation and reminding myself….”It’s like riding a bike, it’s like riding a bike”…...and so it was, because my feet were pedalling like hell all the way up the pitch, and my ego had a big puncture by the time I got to the belay. Bish was ‘in the van’ for the rest of the climb, and it was only by the time we got to the final long grade III/IV ice pitch that I finally relaxed a bit and actually started enjoying the climbing. We had a mingle among the Sauchiehall Street-like hordes on the plateau and made it back to the carpark by around 3:00pm.

The drive over to Torridon was in appalling weather, so we had obviously made the right choice climbing-wise. We had a couple of beers in the pub at Kinlochewe where we met JD, then went down to the Ling Hut.

The evening was spent drinking beers, eating curry and talking bollocks for the rest of the night. The weather outside was still very mild and wet when we crashed out in the late hours. An early morning inspection confirmed everyones suspicions of no more climbing to be had and after a long lie we decided on a Ronnie Corbett-bash on Meall a Ghiubhais by Kinlochewe. It wasn’t a bad day in the end.

I think I might try a few routes this winter…...once I get my puncture sorted.

…it’s just like riding a bike after all.

Big Al, February 20th 2002