INFLATABLE TRIG POINTS - CLICK IMAGES FOR FULL VIEW

It's a bargain said "R" - my target is 60 for the year - and it'll be dead easy with this amazing new product.

"R" on a 'big hill' in the midst of a whiteout - hell!

Just after the 'M Point', and it's straight down to Curlers for a pint!

Penguin's Revenge: Click to enlarge (Note R with ITP)

Opening suggestions from Big Al:

1. Take one along to a Bothy Meet, it'll be better company than a grumpy C
2. Use one as an air-bag when travelling in Bish's car
3. Join 2 together and Anoif can use it as a bra
4. Stick horns on one and bingo - viking helmet
5. Inflate one and then wait for JD to say "I could inflate that faster than you"
6. Ice breaker in a Bothy - say to a FEB "Stick this up yer arse"

7. Put a hole in the bottom, make it 'Squeal like a hog' and you have a sex toy for Nodrog
8. Put a zip on the front, and you have a walk-in tent for Shaz
9. Fix a beer tap on top, place a bar stool beside it and you have a Mini-Bar for Wee Iain
10. Put a bowl of cabbage soup inside it and you have living quarters for a Polish Au Pair girl on an Achnahaird camping trip
11. Cover it with ice, and put it in a big barn and open it up as Scotland's Premier Indoor Ice-climbing Centre and charge FEBs a packet to climb on it
12. Put it in the middle of a field, call it 'The Standing Stone Circle of MacHenge' and charge gullible FEBs a packet etc etc.
13. Used successfully by Rangers last season to win the Treble.
14. Apparently 80,000 zillion were in Seville at the UEFA Cup Final.
15. When travelling it may be used as a padded banjo case.
16. Used by Kylies as muster/assembly points on the hill whilst waiting for stragglers to catch up.
17. At special club social events fill one full of best malt whisky and pass it round for all your drunk steamer acquaintances to slobber into and leave floaters in.
18. Could be used as a float for the massive carry out on the next Squad Beer Island Trip.

1. Get 11 of them and put them on the pitch at Ibrox, Who'd know the difference?
2. Get an extra large one and put it over your car thus allowing you to park any where without getting a ticket.
3. Super glue handles onto it and use it as a spachopper
4. Fill it with Stella for a bothy trip
5.  Take it into your sleeping bag at night and avoid midnight toilet trips
6. Write XXXXXXX Chat Zone on it, put it in front of your monitor and pretend the chat room has crashed (again!)
7. Send a job lot over to Cuba as bouyancy aids for chevrolets

1. Could you use it as a portable step for getting onto high bar stools? Or over fences and gates?
2. Perhaps Big Al could use it to sit on when there is no available armchair – even better if it comes with its own TV remote control.
3. Calum could stand beside it eating chocolate.
4. C could arrange to leave the key to the bothy under it – then keep moving about so no-one can find it.
5. JD could use it as a decoy at the dinner table if he thinks he won’t make it back in time for tea
6. Throw some clothes on it and, voila, a makeshift babysitter for R after she has insulted her last remaining friend and has no-one else left to ask (only problem being, given the superior maternal instinct of the ITP, children might bond with it causing irreversible psychological trauma when the ‘babysitter’ has to leave
7. Flatten it, write ‘Munro Comple(a)tion Certificate’ on it, stick it in a frame and give it to R, ‘cos that’s the only way she’s going to get one; R could use it as a ‘case study’ to practice on for her aromatherapy course as it is unlikely that there will be a queue of willing live volunteers.

1. replace handbags on the dancefloor
2. chuck it down the hill to ascertain fastest descent route (non-competitive)
3. put one in your rucksack at the bothy meet and let someone else carry in the wine and coal
4. paint a face on it and sit it on your chair at work while you go for extended lunch at internet cafe - no-one will notice as productivity will probably increase........