Relationships

"A man who wants to seduce a woman must climb over mountains, a girl who wants to seduce a man only needs to go through a wall of paper." — Chinese saying.

"If she spends more time drooling over gear catalogs than you, takes guidebooks into the bathroom to spend some quality time, blows off a friend's wedding or bridal shower to go to the Phoenix Bouldering Contest, then *maybe* she's a climber." — Rex Pieper, about girlfriends.

A relationship is like a tough mountain climb — if you are willing to persevere through the tough spots, you will come out stronger and feel more fulfilled as you continue to confront and overcome obstacles in your way." — Steve.

"I like climbing for pleasure but wouldn't like to do it for money. Same thing than for sex." — Me about guiding.

"The Penthouse suite at the Ballagio is definitely better than the 13 mile campground !" — Eric D. Coomer about Red Rocks.

"Naked male sport climbers ? No ! I want naked male trad hogs ! Pushing 50 or over, very hairy chest and back, front tooth missing (no dental insurance), wrinkled yellow toenail fungus, sunburnt dome with long gray ponytail (sparse curls will do), fingers the size of Polish sausages, torn-off nipples due to offwidth damage...
Now there's a man, an image to behold, every climber chick's dream. And when he says: 'Hey, honey, wanna do the DNB ?' you just melt into a heap of adoring lard." — Inez Drixelius.

"I'm getting cooked on all this wall climbing slavery. I want to sit on the beach, get a tan, and look at girls !" — Pete Takeda, A rock and a hard place.

"You are a daredevil. You never care for your home. What will happen to me and the children ?" — Sherpa Tenzing's wife.
"I'd rather die on Everest than in your hut" — His reply.

"We'll climb with you and steal your women." — Todd Skinner and Paul Piana.

"There are all kind of values to be gotten out of climbing. Sometimes you can take a girlfriend up a climb and get laid for it." — Steve Wunsch.

"Climbing is no longer the best thing to do in this area." — Bernard about the nude sunbathers beneath the Calanques.

"Rockclimbing, for me, is liking making Love to the Stone... for that I like to take some clothes off and be comfortable." — Karl Baba.

"Keep you current job and pick up a hobby. Take up some activity that tends to attract the young and attractive: rock climbing, say..." — From the San Fran Guardian alt.sex column by Andrea Nemerson, in answer to a bi-guy wondering which new job he should get to get laid the most...

"This is a group of people I used to go walking with. (long pause) That's me on the left. (even longer pause) On the right is the woman I married, Audrey. (very long pause, speaker looks at shoes) Which just goes to show that danger lurks where you least expect it." — Don Whillans commenting on a B&W slide showing a group of smiling hikers.

"When I first hit Yosemite in 1957, I was a mountain trooper from Colorado, as straight as a lodgepole sapling and celibate to boot. Fortunately, two derelicts then in garbage-can residence soon put me straighter with vicious amounts of Red Mountain wine. When not busy laying the groundwork for the Golden Age (that's about all they were laying), it seemed to my neophyte eye they stayed drunk. Why not ? Even many years later women were unknown to that distant world... The only thing down at Camp 4 in the Elder Days was dog shit and Tri-Delts surrounded by their betrailered parents, about as accessible as the Crab Nebula. So we had beatoff contests at the bivouac ledges, drenched our sleeping bags in semen, got drunk and indulged in towering fireside smut." — Mike Borghoff.

"Well, I'll say this: climbing can kill you, but women can destroy you. There's a big difference, y'know." — Derek Hersey.

"So, are you a climber too ?" — Great pick-up line ....

"Remember when sex was safe and climbing was dangerous ?" — Chuck Pratt.

"Sitting on that first hook of the day, it's like your first time having sex. Your entire focus is on one very small object." — Kelly Rich.

"There are all kinds of values to be gotten out of climbing. Sometimes you can take a girlfriend up a climb and get laid for it." — Steve Wunsch.

"Never noticed a female monkey not climbing as well as a male, have you ?" — Don Whillans on being asked it if was possible for a woman to be a better rock climber than a man.

"Colorado... Come for the girls, stay for the climbing." — Brad B, who just left Colorado to follow a girlfriend in Utah... ;-)